When church feels like homecoming!
"The family of faith that I call home": St. George's of The Blue Mountains ACW
GROWING BEYOND THE DOORS
By Rev. Canon Grayhame Bowcott
I REMEMBER a conversation that dates back almost fifteen years now. I was a newly minted deacon at the time, serving the congregation of St. John’s-by-the-Lake in Grand Bend. Gathered around a table in their beautiful parish hall, were members of their parish council and supportive members of the congregation who were having an open, personal conversation about what they loved most about their church and why they chose to be so engaged in the ministries of that community.
“I consider St. John’s to be the family of faith that I call home,” I remember one parishioner sharing at that gathering. This response resonated with everyone around that table. One member quickly responded by saying: “That should be our motto!”, and, shortly afterwards, that’s exactly what happened.
I remember that moment, both vividly and fondly, because that was when the congregation began to wonder: How might we reach out to newcomers and potential members in a way that would allow them to experience church as being a homecoming of sorts? A place where newcomers and seekers would feel included, valued, and familiar?
Since that conversation, 15 years ago, I have looked and listened intently at the places where relational bonding takes place within congregations. In University research over the last decade, when I have been able to formally survey over a thousand participants from numerically growing Anglican congregations, asking the question: “What keeps bringing you back to church?”, the number one answer that participants shared, not surprisingly, is that it is the warm welcome, the supportive community and the familiar feeling of homecoming that keeps members engaged with congregational activities and worship services.
In these studies, a sense of being valued and included within a Christian congregation ranked even higher than one’s preference for church traditions, worship expressions, and denominational identity. The words: “I feel like I belong here,” are perhaps the most profound expression of Christian identity that one can experience in the Church today. If only this were true for all those seeking a family of faith to call home.
The truth is, there is no one, magic solution for making people feel at home in a church community. While different groups of people do things differently, it seems to me that the secret of successful bonding within Christian communities is the result of intentionality.
Are our congregational leaders regularly talking about how they are prioritizing getting to know the visitors and newest members in the community? Are we developing habits of invitation to help them to feel that they belong? Or do we default to spending most of our time with the people we already know? Sitting in our familiar pews, so to speak, of routines and habits with our friends?
The most current example that I’ve experienced of an intentional growth of relationships in my home congregation of The Blue Mountains has been found in the recent explosion of new members in our Anglican Church Women’s group. Participation in the group has almost doubled in size over the last six months as a result of the ladies’ leadership team deliberately reaching out and introducing themselves to new women in our congregation.
In a shift that seems to prioritize relationship over responsibility, our ACW is spending more time focusing on the fellowship aspect of their meetings. They are encouraging long-serving members to get to know the newest faces and to invite them into the various facets of church life that they have found meaningful for years. It’s one thing to invite a new person into a sense of belonging, but it is another thing entirely to make that invitation feel like a homecoming. The difference is found in the care and attention that is invested in each authentic invitation.
So, if I am able to leave one thought in your mind this month, my hope is that it is to explore the places in your own congregation where relational bonding may be taking place. Does your congregation make space to welcome newcomers? Are you getting to know them personally? Let us strive to make each first impression of Church an experience of homecoming for all those God brings to our doors.
Rev. Canon Dr. Grayhame Bowcott is passionate about fostering congregational relationships and sharing our Anglican vocation with others. He serves as Rector of St. George’s, The Parish of The Blue Mountains, and as Program Director for the Licentiate in Theology program at Huron University.