Anglican Fellowship of Prayer
How to:
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Start a prayer group From time to time you will be asked for help in starting a prayer group, or adding some zip to an old one. The request may come either from the rector of a church or a member of that parish, possibly someone who has attended a workshop on prayer. (Ask your Diocesan Representative for more information on a workshop.) About Prayer Groups: Anglican Fellowship of Prayer has been a leader in the small group movement. Under Helen Shoemaker, AFP began to initiate small parish prayer groups in the late 1940's, long before the idea had caught on at a wider level. In fact, Anglican Fellowship of Prayer began as a fellowship of small prayer groups that held an annual conference to encourage each other. Today many Episcopal churches have small groups. Although the function may be very similar, they go under a wide variety of names: fellowship groups, shepherd groups, care groups, cell groups, bible study groups, intercession groups, meditation groups, and prayer groups. Most of these groups would include: (A) bible meditation (B) personal sharing (C) spiritual direction (D) prayer (E) social time (before or after the meeting) As you might expect, the name of the group usually indicates the amount of time allotted to each of these functions. (In some cases, one or more of the functions will be omitted altogether.) whatever its chosen designation, any group that normally spends 20-30 minutes of its meeting time at prayer could be considered a prayer group. How To Begin: If a priest asks for help in starting a prayer group, you should ask him or her to identify between five and twelve people who would be interested in belonging to a prayer group or who want to learn more about prayer. These people should then be invited to a meeting, either at the church or in someone's home, where you can talk about the purpose and function of a prayer group. If a lay member of the church asks for your help, follow the same steps as above but be sure to gain the approval of the parish priest first. The person inviting you should speak to the rector before you agree to come or any invitations are issued If the rector is nervous of prayer groups, the following steps may help. Call the rector and outline what you will be talking about. It may be necessary to remind the rector (gently) that you were appointed to this ministry by the bishop, and that one of the functions of a parish prayer group is to support both the bishop and the parish clergy in prayer. Invite the priest to attend this introductory session that you will be leading but make sure it is understood that the priest is not normally expected to attend a prayer group meeting. Point out that in the beginning, niembers of a new prayer group contract to meet for a period of six-to eight weeks. If at the end of that time, the priest feels the prayer group is causing problems, he/she can ask for its termination. If, in spite of these measures, the rector does not want you to come and talk to people in the parish about starting a prayer group, do not go. Instead, you may suggest that those who invited you might like to join another prayer group for a while, or that they just plunge in and start a prayer group on their own. You can help by suggesting books, and by praying for them. In such circumstances, the Holy Spirit will see to the rest! The Introductory Meeting: Introduction: 1) Begin by explaining that getting to know each other is a crucial part of forming a prayer group. Ask those present to answer the question "Who Am I?" giving their full names and some information they feel is important about them selves. 2) Explain that a prayer group has two functions - to pray for others and to help its members grow spiritually. The five functions of a prayer group are structured to help this happen. A) Bible Meditation: 1) Christian spirituality is based on the Bible. Both the Old and New Testaments record the working of God in the jives of his people. Meditation or meditation in the Christian tradition means to read and carefully think about a passage of scripture so that God can speak to us through it. Although meditation is normally an individual experience, group meditation is an invaluable training for those who are relatively new to this spiritual discipline. when reading a particular passage of scripture, Joan will benefit from hearing what the Holy Spirit taught Mary in that passage, and Mary likewise will benefit from John's insight into the reading. 2) There should be a pattern for reading the scriptures: The scripture readings for the following Sunday. A book of the bible - preferably a gospel or epistle. A thematic study from the scriptures, perhaps on healing or prayer. 3) Many useful bible study guides are available, however it is important to remember that this is not a time to get educated about the background or sources of the scriptures. Theological study should be done beforehand, or afterwards if curiosity is aroused by a particular discussion. The purpose of meditating on scripture is to hear what God is saying to me (or us) personally. If you use a bible study guide, try to use one based on the inductive bible study method. A period of silence should always follow the initial reading of the passage to allow for silent reflection and personal meditation. 4) By way of illustration, you might like to lead a brief study on Acts 3:1-16. Read the passage over carefully, first in silence, then have someone read it out loud. Ask people to share what strikes them about the passage. How might it apply to them meeting as a group? Points that you may want to bring out in the discussion are: Peter and John were going to the Temple for prayer - their hearts were set towards worship. Peter and John were going together - Jesus said that where two or three were gathered in his name, he would be in their midst. A prayer group only needs two or three members to be effective. Peter and John had no money but they prayed for the lame man. Through prayer, they gave him some-thing better than money. A prayer group has no money to give away. But what if does give is far greater value than money. Peter said that the healing of the lame man had nothing to do with his and John’s own power or godliness, but came from faith in Jesus. In the same way, a prayer group does not have any power of its own for healing. Peter said that he and John were witnesses that God had raised Jesus from the dead. Through its faithful meeting for prayer, week by week. members of a prayer group witness to their faith in a living Lord. B) Personal Sharing: Personal sharing of personal and spiritual problems normally occurs during the Bible study time or during the period immediately before the intercession time when requests for prayer are brought forward. Members of a prayer group should be warned against gossip and reminded regularly that any confidences shared within the group are not intended to be shared more widely, even for prayer. A lack of trust within the group will seriously hinder or even destroy its development. C) Spiritual Direction In its classical form, spiritual direction is normally a one-on-one relationship between a spiritual director and someone seeking spiritual guidance. A spiritual director can help someone come closer to God by encouraging good purposes by helping him/her to recognize and do away with spiritual hindrances by sharing personal experience, helpful advice, books and prayer resources. Although few people have the luxury of a personal spiritual director, a good prayer group through the grace of God can meet many of the same needs. Individuals in the group encourage others by their own example, while difficulties shared can be helped through the combined experience, wisdom and assistance of the group members. D) Prayer The five facets of prayer noted in the Personal Prayer Notebook are: adoration, thanksgiving, confession, intercession and petition. A prayer group should always begin with adoration and worship of God. How this is done may vary from one group to another. Some enjoy singing praise songs, while others read a psalm, or have a time of silent adoration. A prayer for the Holy Spirit to open our understanding and speak to us through the scriptures should always precede the time of bible study. Reasons for thanksgiving, confession, intercession and petition may come to light through the times of sharing, and these should be included in the prayer time. In praying for the sick, avoid unnecessary discussion of symptoms. We meet to pray for the healing of both people and situations. Sadly, it always seems to be easier to find causes for intercession than for thanksgiving. Some groups find it helpful to keep a journal of special prayer requests so that a healing six months later does not go unnoticed. Thanksgiving for answered prayer is especially important both because it honours God and because it helps to build our faith. God often calls a prayer group into being for a particular purpose. and members should be aware that it is God who has called them together. The reason for a group coming together may not become clear immediately. but usually becomes evident through the way members want to allocate their time for prayer. Of course, God may also use a prayer group for more than one purpose and prayer group leaders should recognize that members often come with a mixed agenda. Some meet primarily for intercession on behalf of their parish. They pray for the clergy, the Sunday school. the choir, the confirmation class, the worship on Sunday, the parish sick list, the vestry meetings, the building fund, the outreach program and so on. Some may meet primarily for meditation and petition to deal with personal needs resulting from traumatic childhood experiences, marital problems, divorce, or serious illness. Some have had an experience of God and are drawn to a prayer group as a way of solid living and expanding that experience. Problems: Issues that may cause problems in a prayer group are lack of commitment, betrayal of personal trust, domination of the discussion by one person, non-acceptance of different styles of prayer and not sticking to the agreed times for beginning and ending the meeting. It is up to the leader and the group to recognize and deal with these problems. Lack of commitment is usually shown in sporadic attendance, late arrivals. early departures, and poor preparation for bible study (if this is expected.) The leader should discuss the problem with the member concerned to see what is causing the trouble and whether the group can do anything to help. (For instance, the offer of a lift by another member could help if transportation is a problem. Or someone might find it easier to host the meeting in her home than to find a baby-sitter in order to go to another house.) One way to deal with this, especially when a group is just beginning, is to agree to meet for six or eight weeks only, with everyone expected to be there every week. At the end of that time, take a two to four week break (perhaps over the Christmas holidays or after Easter) and then start again. Different styles of prayer are very personal for the people involved. Some are unwilling to pray aloud (unless they are reading a prayer); others may want to pray in tongues. Those who wish to remain silent should be encouraged to know that their prayer is just as important and acceptable to God as the prayer of those who pray aloud. Such a person may be helped by being given the parish sick list to read aloud during the intercession period. Conversely, if some members are disturbed by those who want to pray in tongues. the group should remember St. Paul's warning not to quench the Spirit. E) Social Time The social time is one element of a prayer group which is completely dispensable! At the same time it is often the most popular pan of the meeting. Unfortunately, the social aspect has a tendency to take over, partly because praying together generates such a warm climate of fellowship and unity. Strict control is necessary to keep the socializing within bounds, or else the group will fall apart because it is not meeting its primary purpose The meeting itself should begin and end on time! If refreshments are offered either before or after the group meeting, they should not be allowed to interfere in ariv way with the format of the meeting. Either the group leader or an appointed timekeeper should make sure that everything moves on schedule. Having a bell to ring when it is time to begin the meeting (or setting an alarm clock to go off when it is time to pray) can help with an unruly group. Variations When a new prayer group is being formed. some decisions need to be taken about its form and process. How often will it meet? (Weekly? Alternate weeks?) Where will it meet? (Church or a member's home?) When will it meet? (Morning, noon, or evening?) How long will it meet? (Half an hour, an hour, two hours?) What is the primary purpose of the group? (Only for parish concerns? Grow in prayer?) Who will be invited to attend? (Members of the church only? Friends and neighbours?) A group that meets at the church for an hour just before the mid-week Eucharist will be very different from a group that meets in the evening at a member's home where non-attending friends and neighbours are welcome. Those beginning the prayer group need to pray for discernment to know God's will and purpose for the group. As stated at the beginning, prayer is the only one of the five group functions that must be part of a prayer Group's pattern Prayer Groups -- a "how to" Booklet is available at $2 a copy from the AFP office. A prayer chain is a prayer group that meets only occasionally, but is always available for intercession when needed. It may meet as often as once a month or as infrequently as once or twice a year. When a prayer chain does meet, it is usually for a corporate Eucharist, a time of teaching, or an annual commissioning service. Starting Small A prayer chain usually starts small with a group of three to five members under the leadership of one person. When a prayer request comes in (from the rector, parishioners, neighbours, etc.), the leader telephones the other members of the chain to communicate these needs. Most frequently, the leader will phone another member, who phones another member, and so on, until everyone has been notified. This pattern of contact is what has given the prayer chain its name. Each member is a link leading on to the next member or link in the chain. An ordinary metal chain is only as strong as its weakest link. The same thing is true of a prayer chain, which demands serious commitment to prayer from its members. How does a prayer chain expand? As a prayer chain grows, it is not practical to have it extend too far in length. When a chain grows beyond five links, it is wise to break it into two strands, with the leader calling the first link in each strand. As the chain grows, the first link will start calling two people, in this way, emergency needs for prayer can be communicated in the shortest possible time. Each member should have a list of the names and phone numbers of other links in their chain so that if they have difficulty reaching their link they can go on to notify the next in line. Prayer chain members normally commit to pray daily for the needs placed before them, and this daily prayer for common concerns has a powerfully unifying effect. Even though prayer chain members seldom meet, they forge a strong bond of fellowship through prayer!
Prayer chains are particularly suitable - for the elderly arid other shut-ins - house-bound mothers with young children - business people who have no time for extra meetings The Leader: The leader plays a pivotal role in keeping the chain organized by undertaking the following responsibilities: Photocopies and mails a prayer list of non-emergency needs to the chain members. Keeps the prayer roster up-to-date. Recommends helpful books or tapes on prayer that are available through the church library or the leader Maintains contact with the rector (in a parish prayer chain) or the bishop's representative (in a diocesan prayer chain). - Receives special requests to be passed through the chain to other members. - Reminds members to ask anyone who calls in for prayer to call again within a month for an update, - Passes on update information. - Calls meetings and arranges for annual commissioning service. A Prayer Cycle is simply a list of people and concerns for whom prayer is desired. Prayer cycles may be organized on a weekly, monthly, quarterly or annual basis. For instance, The Anglican Cycle of prayer is an annual listing of Anglican dioceses and bishops throughout the world. It is used regularly in churches throughout the Anglican Communion both for daily intercessions and Sunday services. Diocesan Prayer Cycle. Many dioceses (depending on the size of the diocese) have a monthly prayer cycle where the bishop(s), clergy, and all the parish churches are prayed for in turn (usually by deaneries or regions). Special events like diocesan convention, diocesan prayer conference or Cursillo may also be included. Copies of the cycle are mailed to all the parishes and these usually become the basis for parish intercessions at Sunday worship services. If your diocese does not have a prayer cycle, ask your bishop if he/she would like you to prepare one and circulate it. Before printing and circulating a diocesan prayer cycle, be sure to check it first with the bishop or someone designated by the bishop. One further note: Your bishop may not want you to prepare a diocesan prayer cycle, and then you may later discover that the responsibility for this has been given to someone else, such as a staff member in the diocesan office. Do not be discouraged! The bishop obviously feels that this is a diocesan responsibility, and your offer to prepare a cycle may have helped him to recognize the omission. Parish Prayer Cycle. A parish prayer cycle is intended to help parishioners pray for the mission and ministry of their church. The roster will usually include the clergy. secretary, organist, youth worker, janitor, and any other paid staff as well as regular volunteers like Sunday school teachers. It may also include organizations like A.C.W., parish outreach ministries, newcomers to the church and members of the confirmation class. Some churches pray for all their members! A parish prayer group or prayer chain could prepare such a cycle and make it available to the parishioners. The first point is to know why you are organizing a quiet day. In our busy, frantic, modem lives there is often no time to stop and be quiet for more than a few minutes together. Prayers are said quickly (if at all) before we rush out to the office, and at night we fall into bed too tired to think. A quiet day is an effort to give people a little window of scheduled time to pray, to be still, and to listen to God. (1) When To Have A Quiet Day Time of Year: Often quiet days are held at a season of special devotion (like Lent or Advent) when people feel that they ought to be praying more than usual. Lenten quiet days may be held anytime from Ash Wednesday onward, but it is smart to avoid Holy Week when there are usually a lot of other services people will feel they want to attend. (It's better to avoid the week before Holy Week for the same reason.) Advent quiet days are also better held right at the beginning of Advent because people (especially women) get busier and busier as Christmas approaches. Day Of The Week: The choice of a weekday or a Saturday will depend on whom you want to attract to the quiet day. Full-time homemakers and retired people are often free on a weekday in a way that they may not be on a weekend. A Saturday quiet day, on the other hand, may help those who most need such a quiet space. Another possibility is to plan a quiet afternoon on a Sunday alter church. You may also want to consider having the quiet day on a day of special devotion like Ash Wednesday, St. Patrick's Day, or the Feast of the Annunciation, in order to give it a special focus. (2) Where To Have A Quiet Day A parish church is often a good setting for a quiet day. If the quiet day is being arranged for people who come from outside the parish (as in a diocesan quiet day) and you have a choice about the church you are using, check out the following points before making a decision on location: a) Is the church easily accessible for those coming from elsewhere?
b) Will the church be quiet?
c) Does the church have attractive facilities?
(3) who will lead the quiet day? A quiet day may be led by a priest, a member of a religious community, or a lay person. The necessary consideration is that the person should be someone who is prayerful, and who already has experience in teaching about prayer, scripture, and Christian living. It is important that a quiet day conductor (or retreat leader) should be personally comfortable with the silence, so that he or she can help others receive some benefit from the quiet time. (4) How can lunch be arranged? The easiest (and usually the best) arrangement is for people to bring a bag lunch with them. This saves a lot of worry about how many to cater for and means that some people can turn up (or not turn up) at the last minute without causing any inconvenience. Even if a host parish offers to provide a casserole and salad luncheon, it is usually better not to do this because inevitably some women will feel that they need to work on the luncheon when they would rather be at the quiet day. Also there is usually a lot of noise, chatter and confusion in the area of the kitchen while the luncheon is being prepared, served and cleared up - and this does not help to maintain a quiet atmosphere! However, a small committee of volunteers should be set up to provide coffee, tea and juice during the day, and at lunch. Also it is helpful to have a tray of extra sandwiches for the forgetful, as well as some apples or other fruit, and cookies. (5) How long should a quiet day be? A quiet day can be as long or as short as the committee arranging it wants. You can have a quiet morning, a quiet afternoon or a quiet day. You can begin in the morning anytime from 8 am till 10 am, and you can finish anytime between 2 and 6 p.m. At the end of this section are some sample schedules for quiet days, mornings and afternoons. (6) Can we sing at a quiet day? Quiet days are meant to be free of talking, but singing praises to God is always right. The church organist is not likely to be available for the whole quiet day, but might possibly be free for the opening or closing Eucharist. It doesn't hurt to ask. You may also want to ask what fee would be expected for this service. A good solution to the problem is finding someone else who would like to attend the quiet day, and who also plays the organ or piano well enough to accompany the singing. In this case, you will need to confirm with the host parish that your substitute organist will be allowed to use the organ or church piano. A third alternative is to find someone who plays the guitar and sing music appropriate for that instrument. (Keep in mind however that a quiet day is not a good time to teach new and unfamiliar songs. It would be better to have no music at all if most of the quiet day participants are not used to renewal-type songs!) And finally, if there are a sufficient number of participants, you can sing some well-known hymns a cappella - without accompaniment. There are bound to be some good choir members in attendance, and you may even find a volunteer organist for next year (7) How do we let people know about the quiet day? If this is just a parish quiet day, letting people know about it is easy because you can use the normal parish communication channels like the parish newsletter, Sunday bulletin, etc. A regional or diocesan quiet day will demand a little more effort. Notices should be prepared and sent to the diocesan newspaper, and to the parishes involved for insertion in their bulletins. You can also draw up a small poster (8 ½" x 11") that can be photocopied and sent with the bulletin insert to parishes (use an 8 ½ x11 envelope to avoid unnecessary folding.) For a diocesan quiet day it would also be a good idea to contact other organizations with a special interest in spiritual matters. (8) Who will pay for the quiet day? Although a quiet day can be arranged very cheaply with volunteer help, there are still going to be some expenses. Unless they are donated, these may include refreshments (coffee, tea and snacks), the rental of the church and its facilities (to help cover set-up and cleaning costs), and printing and postage for publicity. You will also have to pay travel expenses and offer an honorarium to the quiet day conductor. (The honorarium could be anywhere from $20 to $150, depending on the number of talks, the length of the day, the experience of the speaker, and whether he/she has an established fee for speaking.) There are three ways to pay for the costs of the day: i) Charge a small fee. Twenty people paying $5 each will give you a working budget of $100, which should be ample for a parish retreat where publicity costs are negligible. If you expect 100 people, the income will be $500, which will again be sufficient for most of your needs. if you can, get to know the leaders of other prayer-oriented organizations in your diocese (like Daughters of the King, Mother's Union, Cursillo, Brotherhood of St. Andrew, Faith Alive, ERM, ARM and any religious communities in your diocese.) We are not in competition with any of these groups. Rather, Anglican Fellowship of Prayer is often able to act as a catalyst to bring different groups together to hold something like a Diocesan Prayer Conference. The AFP motto is Prayer Unites and it really does! (The closer we come to Jesus, the closer we come to each other.) ii) If you are trying to have a diocesan quiet day for the first time or if you anticipate particularly heavy expenses for the leader's travel or honorarium, you could inquire if there is any possibility of your applying for a diocesan grant. (Ask your parish priest for advice on this one or try the diocesan program officer.) iii) Take up an offering to cover expenses. This requires a little more faith than charging a fee, but if your expenses are small, it's a nice way to do it. You may be surprised at how generous people can be! However, if you are charging a fee, it is usually preferable not to take an offering also unless you do it for an announced and specific purpose like a missions offering, or as a gift to the host parish (as a way of meeting your obligation there.) (9) What does a Quiet Day Committee do? a) The Convenor is responsible for calling the committee together, setting an initial planning meeting, and arranging for any other meetings. He/she will arrange for use of a church facility when this has been decided on (or delegate the responsibility), and will invite the quiet day speaker. The speaker should be asked to confirm a proposed schedule (or to provide one) and this should then be copied and given out to participants on the quiet day. b) The recording secretary will keep the minutes of all meetings, and notes about any interim decisions that are taken. c) The corresponding secretary will primarily be involved with public relations - sending out notices to churches, groups, newsletters and newspapers. He/she (or the convenor) will also write thank you letters after the quiet day to the speaker, the rector of the host parish and any others who have contributed to the day. d) The treasurer will keep track of expenses and income, and will write checks for all expenses, including the speaker's travel and honorarium. e) The hospitality convenor will arrange for all refreshments served during the day. Also, if there are a large number of participants who do not know the church layout, it would be helpful to post signs outside the church and inside the hall to direct people to the hall entrance, washrooms, etc. Or it may be easier to provide a photocopied map for each participant. f) The sacristan is responsible for setting up the altar for the Eucharist, and arranging flowers (if any). Usually an altar guild member of the host parish is willing to undertake this responsibility g) The book-table convenor is not strictly necessary but can exercise a helpful ministry by providing good books for spiritual reading. (A number of good books for this are available from the AFP) Quiet Day Schedule (Sample 1) 9:00 am Coffee, registration, orientation (if in an unfamiliar place) 9.30 Silence Begins Eucharist and First Meditation 11.15 Second Meditation 12.30 p.m. Lunch (Silence is maintained, but it is helpful to play some meditative music.) 1:00 p.m. Third Meditation 2:15 Final Meditation and Prayers Silence Ends
9.30 am Coffee, registration, orientation 10:00 am Silence Begins Opening Eucharist First Meditation 11:15 Hymn or Canticle Second Meditation 12.15 Lunch 1 p.m. Hymn Third Meditation 2:00 Evening Prayer Fourth Meditation 2:55 Closing Prayers Hymn Some people like to finish with a time of corporate sharing. This really depends on whether it is an already existing group that is having the quiet day. Many people do not like to share deep religious feelings with strangers and will simply slip away early if sharing is part of the quiet day. Coffee, tea and light refreshments are always welcome at the end of a quiet day! A Home Quiet Day Although most of these guidelines are intended for a larger group, you may wish to consider having a quiet day in a home. Guidelines for this may be found in a separate pamphlet A Home Quiet Day available from the AFP. |